I’m a notorious fashionista, especially in the shoe department. In my closet alone, I have a pair of shoes, a pair of flip flops and a sock that nobody can touch. What I wear depends on my current mood.

While shopping last winter, I found a black pair of SafeTStep shoes. I’m proud to say they’re still on my feet and still kicking.

I was drawn to their simple design and flat bottoms. Their tread is deep and vicious like a cheese grater, allowing me to walk on smooth surfaces like Spiderman. Wet floors are no challenge for these bad boys.

The inside is hard enough to hold the shoe together through extreme strolling, yet soft enough to cradle the foot like a kitten in an oven mitt.

The best part is, they only cost $40.

After seven or eight solid months of walking, there are only a few signs of wear. The skin is scuffed a bit on the toes, the seams are showing the early signs of busting, and the inside of the heel is completely gone.

These shoes have served me well, with one exception. There are no ventilation holes.

So, as my feet slide and squelch around in the sweaty dirty padded dungeons that are these shoes for 10 hours a day, they are creating a cocktail of chaos in a corked bottle.

If I lived in a house with a “Take your shoes off at the door” policy, I would have killed my entire family by the time I got to the kitchen.

Of course, now that I’ve worn holes through them, that’s no longer a problem.

These shoes can accomplish so much, I feel like I’m short-changing them by not being an athlete of any kind.

I could walk up a skateboard ramp with ease if I wanted to. I could hike for hours in them without a single blister.

These shoes would be perfect with vent holes, and maybe a disclaimer on the label: Not Approved for Chunkies.

Rating: B