I was hungry and grocery shopping — something I wouldn’t recommend to people who enjoy making rational decisions.
As I hungrily shopped, I came upon a small green box of Betty Crocker’s Suddenly Pasta Salad. The boxes of pasta had a small variation of flavors: caesar, classic, and bacon & ranch.
For some reason, pasta salad sounded amazing and I grabbed the box. The bacon & ranch flavor was calling my name and I was feeling adventurous so I placed the box in my cart.
Cooking the pasta was as simple as boiling some water and pouring uncooked noodles in a pot. Everything was going great as I finished cooking the noodles, extracted the excess water and added in the final touch: the bacon & ranch powdered seasoning.
Spilling the powder over the cooked noodles would have been an appetizing experience if the smell hadn’t been so zesty and rancid.
Against my better judgment, I continued stirring the noodles with the seasoning and eventually took my first bite. My mouth swelled with the extremely unwelcomed taste of bacon and ranch flavors.
Until this moment, I had never realized just how horrible those flavors in a small packet of artificial seasoning could be.
Every other bacon and ranch flavored food has never been this bad to me. Bacon and ranch are great on things like cheese fries, maybe chicken and even those T.G.I.F. potato chips but not this.
I took another bite, thinking maybe my taste buds were not properly adjusted to the extreme levels of fake bacon, only to find that my first conclusion was accurate.
This was a horrible idea and this horrible idea turned into a horrible meal.
Think of how many people are mistakenly grabbing the bacon & ranch flavor without knowing the consequences of pure disgust.
A complete mistake, not only on my part, but also Betty Crocker’s. You let me down, Betty.